Komingwina

can i buy a syomay today? i only have 215.000 until 7 October what should I do: pay my skripsi : 50k pay my make up for wisuda : 100k  so i only have 65 until next month, if i buy syomay today 5k then it will be 60k for 7 days and i have to spend 8k per day less or more. ok got it so lets buy syomay :)

well here I am don't know what should I do with my time, actually now I am at office and should working and don't feel bad when I am get salary but what should I do? all the urgent things is done already, and just a little stuff should I do like : 1. reply email and WA about plating and our strategy during pandemic 2. buy a baking soda 3. ask GHL and SIM about tools and searching where i can get it 4. clean all the smith table and cupboard 5. know how much pt. saka gravir 6. follow up gravir and make invoice  7. prepare for monthly report 

Well this is the thing that makes my energy low faster than before, my grandmother sick and now my mother also sick I don't wanna take care, sick people, because I even don't know how to take care my self properly, I always have a choice and I don't wanna be like them in the future. 

Well i already not speak to my mom and dad for about a week, and this morning they ask me why i am doing that? Well i am in emotion and forget to make sure that my oil in the frying pan was hot or not. So i dont prepare it what i am gonna say and actually forget why is the main reason. So i just answer  “I dont like u” “And i just dont wanna be like u” ”You both dirty” “You both dont know how to take care money” “You both dont have a proper job” Just that, but if they ask me again i will said “You both don’t care about education” “You both too loud that should ask twice even u hear the answer, dont undersatand that i am old and if i say no its mean no, do not force me” “Dont tell me, show me” “Mom dont know how to ride motor bike, even use phone” “U think know what is the best for me but you dont” And more

Hey, this is me again, I actually need to read something today but end up writing here, so here what I thoughts: why people need money? I mean all wanna sell something to get money and that's good but why are they suffering for it? What is urgent? I wanna know why people try so hard to get something like money? We can make money from other ways that not produce a thing, like a review food, write a book, trading, modeling, reseller, photography, ect oh hey i should clean my houses now, okay bye

Hey this idea just pop up on my mind that is I wear white everyday cool right? Why white? Because it a statement of simple and clean, I wanna make my self OCD kinda, will do samething everyday like : Take a bath at 7 am and 7 pm (19.00 WITA) Will exercisese at 5 am and 8 pm (20.00 WITA) Eat oatmeal every morning in a white bowl and same place, same spon, and clean after it but before eat i will make sure i do a chores

Why religion is important in my environment? Why we should belive in god? What happen when we dont? The society will not accept us as a human? Can i ignore it? I cant  Why? Because we live in society 

WELL BECAUSE I TALK ABOUT HATING MY PARENT NOW MY MONEY LOSES ABOUT IDR 150.000 BECAUSE SALAH TRANSFER DAMN IT

Let me tell you, I don't hate just as much as I said it you know it is just a little feeling not a big deal but if u keep it and make it even stronger u are in danger girl, dont let your self-focus in hate. Focus in how u can make IDR 550.000 from IDR 300.000 think girl think harder

I know u hate ur privilege, don't be mad. You can be rich and will not look like your poor step-parent. 

Why you hate your step-parents? Cause they adopted me Let say u cant pick ur parent just like they adopted you okay now is that make u better? No i still hate them Please described  I hate their habit and they dont care about them self they even dont clean their wardrobe. they are poor and make them self look even more poor Are u mad that they look poor? Why? Because I am a shame to show them to my friends  Are your friend's opinion really matters? No, but I hate to look at them and think that I will look like them in the future So don't be like them, help them then? What should I help they won't change their bad habit like I want to, at least they want it by themself You lack communication, don't you? Yes I don't like them their too loud, they ask twice, and stupid as fuck Why u said that? They cant use phone Is that make them stupid? No Why is u being such an ass hole? Because I don't wanna be like them Let me then ask, are u perfect and have the right to judg...

Well, today my mom told me to be more mature, I mean I am 24 years old now and still look like a junior high school student. Not just the look but my mom also complain about my habit that's not responsible with all the thing that will be my task in the future like Balinese women who need to prepare to offer shit. I hate the way my stepmom look and act so kind but she actually talk to much i also hate my self that the fact that i hate her, just now not forever, you know i don't have any right to say a bad thing behind them because i still live here and don't pay any rent to them, I just need to clean the facking house every day. I don't want to talk with them just like a renter and the consumer please cause i hate my self-being like them. I dont want too 

Yesterday I was attending my friend wedding Novi and she is the one that have a same birthday date with me when we are in senior high school, so I feel must come and say hello to everyone, first in my mind I contact my closes friend back then, she is Ryna and Gita which i don't contact very often after we just keep doing out thing at collage, so i go to Instagram and dm both of them Gita whos the first one reply mean i more into her rather than ryna, so I ask her will she come there? And she said yes, I am so glad that she replies so ask her if I can join her and she said yes so I come and prepare my self before seven pm and get lost to find our meet point in Gianyar so I when directly to her house, she seemed still very humble as I remember and I love her mother which is so pretty in my opinion. I also remember her sister wich already a teenager now. So after say hello we go therewith her car that I glad for so we don't use a motorcycle. I meet Gita Kanela Aris and Wirpat we a...

Hai what u really love? My self Are u sure? Hmm maybe not cause sometimes i don't take care my self as much as i should Why u say something like that? Because i don't shower twice a day at 7 am and 6 am, i don't work out every morning at 5 am Then why u don't do that? I want but every morning always wake up late and i am too sleepy. and for take a bath I always procrastination How u can fix that? Thinking about shame and regret that will come in the future of my life maybe that will make me afraid? You still questioning it so that's not strong enough what else make u move and do something  Well somtimes i just do it Why dont u just do it then now? Ok well will ask my causin today to go bike will inform you again later thankyou